guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
