so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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