Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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