sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
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