i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize