No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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