Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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