I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
