Dual....:-)
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize