He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
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