glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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