is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
