Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Drunk is a universal language darling
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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