I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
