No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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