I wanna bring you to show and tell
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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