just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
