He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Randomize
