how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Is it because I queefed?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
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