why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
