his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
