How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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