He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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