I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
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