I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
