Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Randomize