I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
