Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
did i just pee glitter
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