She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
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