Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
