all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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