In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
