watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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