I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
Randomize