Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
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