I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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