im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
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