i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Randomize
