How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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