But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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