Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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