Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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