i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
