We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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