When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize