Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
My vagina is officially offended.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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