As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
