Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
Randomize