We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
