Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
