don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
